Brackets placed on your teeth,
almost nothing you can eat
Constant pain throughout the day
Can't wait til that day
when they finally go away.
No candy, chips, or any hard food
You brush your teeth
after ever bite,
and you struggle
to fall asleep at night.
Years have gone by
and the day has finally come
soon in an hour you're braces will be gone
you walk through the door with excitement on your face
the doctor walks toward you
and you just can't wait,
until he said you had to wait another 28 days.
Your smile fades away
and you look at your mom
you walk out the door
your head to the floor.
Awww.....I was so happy that the person was finally getting on their braces and then they're told that they're not going to get them off. So sad!
ReplyDeleteYeah i know, and ughh tbe inside of my cheeks hurt... :(
ReplyDeletethe
ReplyDeleteI can totally relate to all of that. I liked how you wrote that piece and that I can relate to it and many other people can too.
ReplyDeleteThanks. Yeah a lot of times I have nothing to write about I write about my life and things that I can relate to, because I posted this the day I got my braces on. :)
ReplyDeleteHaha creative piece Peyton. I really liked this piece. It was fun to read and really creative.
ReplyDeleteI loved it! BUT, (just kidding) sometimes you didn't have the same amount of syllable in your lines. (Does that make sense?:S) I could relate to this poem a lot!
ReplyDeleteIt's a creative topic. I like the spin at the end.
ReplyDeleteI really love how the topic can be easily related to. I really liked the twist at the end.
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ReplyDeleteNice job, I can't write poems at all. Good rhyming.
ReplyDeleteNice poem. I liked how you had the person wait years for her braces to come off, but on the day she thought they were coming off, she is told she has to wait another 28 days. For me and I'm sure others, this poem is easy to relate to.
ReplyDeleteI like the rhymes you had.
ReplyDeletethanks :)
ReplyDeletei really like the ending it gives a good turn and it's not predictable. Nice!
ReplyDeleteYeah, I can tell you really don't like your braces, did this really happen to you?
ReplyDeleteNo this did not happen to me, I actually just got them on in January and I thought they weren't as bad as people said they were but now that I have them, they suck.Since the day I got them on I can't wait 'til the day I get them off.
ReplyDeleteWow, great job! It seemed like it had actually happened to you. I can relate to this except for the fact that when the dentist says that they're going to come off, they take them off, they don't make you keep them on like that.
ReplyDeleteActually they do, a lot of my friends think they are getting them off when they go in but they end up having to wait a couple more times.
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